We have all dealt with gossipers, talebearers and slanderers in our relationships. This isn’t a new thing that friends or non friends have been doing to one another. God commanded the Israelites way back when they were released from Egypt saying:

Leviticus 19:16
“Do not go around spreading slander among your people, but also don’t stand idly by when your neighbor’s life is at stake; I am ADONAI.“

But still it continued, even tho they were commanded to stop and Paul ended up dealing with gossipers too:

2 Thessalonians 3:11
“We hear that some of you are leading a life of idleness – not busy working, just busybodies!“

Those that are gossipers, busybodies, and talebearers are people who pry into or meddle in the affairs of others, and then share things that should not be shared. Sometimes they are close friends who you told something in confidence of privacy who didn’t care to keep that secret as it where and thus cause trouble, harm, and pain for others. When they do that, it is for their own personal gain and to hurt others. We all know how much it hurts when friends gossip… A LOT!
I do not want to deeply hurt people I care about and call my friends and vice versa. A gossiper is not a real friend and if you that one or more of your “friends” are gossiping, it is best to go away from them, until they stop.

Proverbs 20:19
“A gossip goes around revealing secrets, so don’t get involved with a talkative person.“

It is a grave thing to gossip and be a talebearer and slanderer. Such a grievous sin in God’s eyes, that we are to put them out and not receive them:

Romans 16:17
“I urge you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and put snares alongside the teaching in which you have been trained – keep away from them.“

We need to make sure that those who gossip, slander, and talebear are known for their behavior and we need to avoid them. God does not want discord and mistrust in His body. When someone gossips, they are found untrustworthy, and God doesn’t want us to associate with them. Sometimes friends gossip without knowing they are, but even if they do it on purpose, it is our duty to just forgive them.

Most of the time, friendships end where one of them have been gossiping or bullying the other:

Proverbs 16:28
“A deceitful person stirs up strife, and a slanderer can separate even close friends.“

Proverbs 17:9
“He who conceals an offense promotes love, but he who harps on it can separate even close friends.“

Gossip will separate even the BEST and CLOSEST friends and that is wrong! We are not to cause division in the Body and we are definitely not to go around telling others what we were told in confidence, wounding those that are our friends!
If you tell something to a friend in secret, and that friend is a REAL friend, they will not go around gossiping it:

Proverbs 11:13
“A gossip goes around revealing secrets, but a trustworthy person keeps a confidence.“

If you are a true friend, you won’t gossip, or slander, or talebear about something you were told in confidence. Your friend told you because they trusted you and believes you are a real friend. Don’t break that trust.

Now… are you a gossiper, talebearer, or slanderer? The Bible gives us a clear list of what they do:

1 Timothy 5:13
“Besides that, they learn to be idle, going around from house to house; and not only idle, but gossips and busybodies, saying things they shouldn’t.“

There is an easy solution to end gossiping… stay away from those that gossip, talebear and slander.

Proverbs 26:20
“If there’s no wood, the fire goes out; if nobody gossips, contention stops.“

Whoa! News flash! If you don’t gossip, then it ceases… what a novel idea! If you know someone who has a problem with gossiping, you can help them to stop by not telling them things that could be gossip material… fire doesn’t burn without fuel. Don’t fuel their fires and they will die.

So let’s all recognize gossip and put an end to it and stop the vicious cycle of mistrust, hurt, and brokeness of the Body.

©AmandaDixon2009